Why Don’t Girls Trust Their Intuition?
Written By Shannon Harrison
As a Soul Path parent, raising my child to trust their intuition has always been important to me. Willow Bradner, the “Accidental Psychic” Amy interviews in Episode 2 of the Soul Path Parenting, says that when it comes to intuition “kids are always showing signs…the majority are what we call today highly sensitive.” I began to wonder when this changes, when kids become “less sensitive” to their intuition and a question came to me:
Are boys and girls given different messages when it comes to intuition?
Back in the early 2000s, I was a public school teacher for 5th graders. The classes were split into all girls and all boys and I played a math game – I would put a problem on the board at the beginning of the lesson and give no instruction to solve it. I would then ask them to simply use their intuition and solve the problem in whatever way they come up with. I made it clear that I didn’t care if the answer was wrong, what I cared about is that they look to their own inner knowledge to approach the problem.
The boys loved it.
The girls cried.
Not only did they cry, they began getting angry with me. How did it come to this? How did these girls come to lose their trust in their intuitive intelligence to the point where they had to be told what to do or they fell apart?
I was dismayed to say the least. Then, when I became a therapist and spoke to many adults about being in touch with their emotions, I began to identify a pattern in women. The women consistently said that when they were young, the message they were given when they got “emotional” was that they were “too much”, being “over dramatic” and “making mountains out of mole hills.” I began to wonder if this is the type of message that slowly begins to deteriorate their intuition. When I did run up against males who had issues trusting themselves, the messages that seemed to have deteriorated the boys’ intuition was something along the lines of you’re “weak” if you allow your emotions to rule you.
Either way, if Willow says that one of the most powerful guides to our intuition is emotion and these are the types of messages we experienced as young children, it’s going to be a wild ride fostering our own children’s intuition, boy or girl, if many of us did not have really good models.
LISTEN TO THE SOUL PATH PARENTING PODCAST ON THIS TOPIC
I like what Willow says about relating to what some might call the “temper tantrum” essentially as not a problem, but an important opportunity for the child to get in touch with and develop their trust in their intuition.
I also heard another great example as I ended up reading another Inc.com article on intuition where you stand up and make a statement, then see how your body feels about it to distinguish fear vs. intuition. Love that! How simple is that for a kid?
I imagine it could look like this: Let’s say your child is on the fence about going to their friend’s house for a sleepover. You could invite them to make the statement “I am going to the sleepover” and ask your child how they feel in their body- are you excited? What’s happening in your heart? Do you experience happy feelings in your body? Now have them try the opposite statement, “I am not going to the sleepover.” Do you feel sick? Icky? Negative feelings in your body? I imagine working with your child to begin to discern their subtle body signals could be incredibly powerful and serve them their whole life!
“I’ve trusted the still, small voice of intuition my entire life. And, the only time I’ve made mistakes is when I didn’t listen.” — Oprah Winfrey
As a parent, I am looking forward to the adventure of fostering this still, small voice of intuition in my child and grateful for the help I am getting along the way.
Author: Shannon Harrison
Shannon is a therapist, former school teacher, and mom. She is the co-author of the book "Sweet Spot: Leveraging Your Talents in Leadership and Life" Currently, Shannon writes about the areas that align with areas that she is passionate about...letting go of the energetic ties that keep us down, personal evolution, and true self-expression.
